Awakening

Good Morning!!! 

This is the picture of the day, or at least the starting point. I didn’t sleep last night, not because of any one reason in particular, but for oh so many wonderful reasons!! I had a revelation last night, and I have been having many of those lately, to be honest. And  opening myself up embracing this season of tremendous and amazing change. Change can be scary at times, other times it can be so enlightening. I have always wanted to pursue photography, and although I have made many excuses along the way, ranging from lack of schooling or equipment or whatever bullshit reason I told myself that I wasn’t what I wanted to be. I never actually BELIEVED that I was, and always have been a photographer, photojournalist, musician, baseball player, and who knows what else! I have been so many different things and in every scenario available, some were beautiful and bright, others were dark and scary. I realized that when I was looking through old photos on my phone with Ashley last night that I have always been taking photos of whatever I saw at the time that I thought looked beautiful. Then I started revisiting those memories, reliving those moments all over again as I’m explaining the backstory of each photo and laughing and sharing these parts of my life with my person! It was enlightening, and amazing and terrifying all at once. What if I had a super weird photo that I couldn’t explain? What if an awkward photo of a past relationships popped up? Then I realized, FUCK IT. Who cares? Why should I be ashamed if there was something embarrassing or possibly a source of conflict in the future? I was open, vulnerable, and honest about each of these photos, which I will share with you more as I progress through this journey with you. Fear is powerful, but we don’t need to be afraid of Fear. It doesn’t have to be the vessel that keeps us from growth, but much rather the tools needed to separate myself from whatever I was scared of, and look at the reason why. This “unprecedented” time we are in is causing such a massive global disruption to “Normal Life” that people are losing their collective Fuckin minds. And they should be. Most of the people who are freaking out are freaking out because of the fear of the future. I challenge you, today and everyday to be mindful of your body, your mind, listen to what it’s telling you. Don’t fight it!! You want to let go of things that have been holding you back. You want to become the person you need to be, and the only thing that’s holding you back is your damn self. That’s it. No one else, stop making excuses or blaming this that or the other. No one controls your life except YOU. The world is changing, there is no doubt about that. However, we can choose to grow with the change or shut ourselves off from it. No matter which path you choose, go in peace. Ask yourself the tough questions. Am I drinking too much? When was the last time I did laundry? Am I eating healthy? Do I get regular exercise? If not, well then do something about it. In the wise words of Stevie Nicks of Fleetwood Mac, “you can go your own way”. Whichever route you take, I wish you the best and the most love and joy there is to offer. I hope you see what I saw in this picture, but I know that you will see whatever you wish to see, and THAT is what makes it beautiful. Just like you! ☺️